Special snowflake that was told by mom no two snowflakes are alike just dies on windshield like thousands of peers

  • SumoMe

ASHEVILLE- Snowflake parents are usually not known for having the warmest hearts.


However, Flake Junior’s mother was an exception, who used to tell her son while growing up and falling through earth’s atmosphere that no two snowflakes are alike and that Flake Junior was indeed very special.


Flake Junior must of let his mother’s words get to his head as the not so invincible snowflake floated into I-40 traffic early Wednesday morning colliding with a Subaru windshield.


Flake Junior was pronounced dead at the scene. Paramedics attempted to resuscitate Flake Junior, but could not identify Flake Junior ‘s body parts from the thousands of other snowflake body parts that laid in the carnage left by the Subaru.


“There is a reason why Humpty Dumpty is a fairy tell,” said Asheville EMT Rick Rogers.


“Besides we didn’t exactly have a magnify glass in the back of the meat wagon.”


The snowflake family group Snow Flake Focus on the Family released a statement shortly after the incident, calling Flake Junior’ s death one more tragic example of how coddling and putting snowflake children on a pedestal can lead to their ultimate demise.


The Snow Crime Scene Investigation Unit questioned the woman driving the Subaru about the incident.


“He just floated out into the road,” said the woman.


“There was nothing that I could do. Well I think it was him, they all looked the same and I think I hit quite a few of them. What was so special about this snowflake again?”


Flake Junior lived to be 45 minutes old and is survived by his sister Flakelita, who resides inside a snowman in a West Asheville resident’s yard.


The SCSCIU however is still trying to find someone that can confirm the remains that they have is indeed Snowflake Junior.

Author: citizenthymes

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